Barking

Person was wrong about the Sheltie. Sheltie doesn't Bite. Sheltie Barks. At Everything.

I don't Bark at Everything, nor does Marmite. But we both Bark at Monty the Mont who is doing his LAST STAND which means he is Barking for Attention again.

When Monty the Mont Barks for Attention Person puts him OUTSIDE and pulls down the blind so he can't see Persons, he can't see Marmite and he can't see me. She calls that ISOLATING HIM FROM THE PACK. He doesn't like that so he then Barks to come in. Person doesn't let him in until he has Stopped Barking.

Soon Monty the Mont will have lost Person's 'Who's the Alpha Wolf' game.

Sheltie Barks when his Person picks up his lead. He Pulls her down the road Barking all the time, and he Barks at Children and he Barks at other Dogs and he Barks at Balls and he Barks at Bicycles and he Barks at people Wearing Hoods.

Now when Sheltie Barks when his Person picks up the lead she is going to put it down again and Do Something Else. He won't go OUT at all until he isn't Barking.

Sheltie is going to Lose the 'Who's the Alpha Wolf' game too.

Here is a picture of Monty the Mont Barking at Magic to Get Attention when he was a Puppy.

New Year's Day

Today is the first day of the New Year. We've not been up on the Sofa.....yet.

I think New Year's Day was even better then Christmas Day! So does Monty the Mont and so does Marmite.

Marmite and Monty the Mont had just been Pretending to Kill me like they often do, when we had a Big Surprise. There, at our side gate, were Ole and Tally!

We quickly all charged down into our Field and we Chased and Chased and we Played and Played and we Barked and Barked and we pretended to Fight. Ole was Very Brave and only sometimes hid under my Look-Out Table which I stand on to see the World. Tally was Very Brave too until she leapt onto her Person's lap.

Ole and Tally are quite small. They are 7 months old and they are Brother and Sister. They are Patterdale Terriers. Ole and Tally are Very Strong and Very Quick.

Ole and Tally DART ABOUT.

I was a Very Happy Dog Playing with Ole and Tally. Marmite was a Very Happy Dog Playing with Ole and Tally. Even Monty the Mont was a Very Happy Dog Playing with Ole and Tally. He wasn't On the Defensive at all.

Anyway, I can still run Fastest in a straight line.

So it has been a Happy New Year's Day.

Here is a Picture of me being Killed by Monty the Mont and Marmite.


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Danger in the Night

In the middle of Last Night I heard NOISES OUTSIDE. I heard a Dog Barking as well. Monty the Mont heard Noises too and so did Marmite.

Marmite started with her funny little sound which is like a BARK trapped inside her trying to get out. Then she broke into a loud WOOF. Then I BARKED. Then Monty the Mont BARKED.

Persons used to SHOUT at us if we BARKED in the Night. When Persons SHOUTED while were BARKING it sounded like WA WA WA WA and like they were Joining In.

We knew then that there must be REAL DANGER because Persons were making a lot of EXCITEMENT and NOISE as well.

So then we knew we had to to BARK and BARK even MORE.

But Person has been doing her Dog Listening and she's being an Alpha Wolf. So do you know what happened? We were BARKING in the Middle of the Night and Person got up and she came and THANKED US. Thanked us for BARKING!

We knew then that she had Taken Notice.

Person opened the Door and she went OUTSIDE but without me, or Marmite or Monty the Mont. We watched her through the glass door. She Looked About. She Listened. This is because the Alpha Wolf makes the Decisions in times of Perceived Danger.

Anyway, Person just came back INSIDE without a word. She went back to bed.

We knew then that everything must be Safe and that we didn't need to help her Defend the Pack.

I went back to bed. Monty the Mont went back to bed and Marmite went back to bed. We didn't need to BARK any more.

Bored

It's Raining and Raining and the Wind is Blowing and Whooshing.

I am Bored. Monty the Mont is Bored and so is Marmite Bored.

There is No News. Person has been working at her Computer all day, making a new Website and a new Database and doing lots of Typing. She is Setting Up her New Business as a Dog Listener. So I am Bored.

I ate a Pen earlier. Person dropped it on the floor.

I had a little Fight out in the Field with Monty the Mont before it started to Rain. Marmite joined in - she always takes Monty the Mont's side and they both chase at me and BARK at me. I show my TEETH but they don't believe me.

The Wind Blew too much and we came Indoors.

I am just so Bored. Monty the Mont is so Bored. Marmite is so Bored.

Anyway, it's Warm on our Beds in front of the Radiator under Person's desk.

Sausages

So, when Person came back from her Course with her Certificate in Advanced Canine Communication we were Very Happy Dogs. Because she didn't Look at us when she came in we were also Very Calm Dogs.

Then she SPOILT it all. She took us to the Person Training ('Dog' Training ha ha) Christmas Party.

We were Very Good Dogs and Very Calm Dogs when we got out of the Car - until we heard lots and lots of BARKING and TALKING and MUSIC coming from our Training Hall.

Monty the Mont was Prancing About. He-Person went ahead with Monty PULLING him.

My She-Person had my lead and she had Marmite's lead. She had to hold on Tight.

I felt Excited. I also felt Scared. Danger? I PULLED so I could get Ahead. Marmite also PULLED so that she could get Ahead.

And Person just STOPPED.

Then she Started again and Changed Direction. She didn't say anything to us at all.

I PULLED again to get Ahead and so did Marmite.

And Person just STOPPED again. Then she Started again and Changed Direction. She didn't say anything to us at all.

I could see that if we carried on like this we would NEVER get to Find Out what was Happening in the Hall.

So then I Walked Very Nicely and Marmite Walked Very Nicely as far as the Door.

There were Lots and Lots and Lots of Dogs, and Lots and Lots and Lots of Persons and lots and lots of Children. I SPRANG FORWARD. Marmite SPRANG FORWARD. I Love Children. Marmite Loves Children. There was Music. I could smell Food. Dogs and Persons and Children were Laughing and Shouting and Barking and Running About and Sitting on different Chairs. We PULLED and we PULLED on our leads.

Monty the Mont then started BARKING and He-Person took him back to the Car. Monty the Mont kept on BARKING in the Car. Monty the Mont always BARKS when he is all by himself in the Car. So He-Person took Marmite back to the Car to keep him company.

My Person said it was BEDLAM.

I played one Game. It was a Sausage game. There was a row of Plates and each had some Sausage on it. I had to run to each plate and eat Sausage as Quickly as possible. I love Sausage. If Person fed me Sausage instead of Dry Neutro I wouldn't Mess About at meal times.

CONFUSING. Lots of Persons I didn't know. Lots of Dogs I didn't know. Lots of Persons I did know and lots of Dogs I did know. I was on my lead so I couldn't Investigate. And for some reason I had Sausages to eat from a row of plates.

Anyway, I did manage to have a quick kiss with Abi the Retreiver who is in my New Class. I love Abi and I love Minto. I couldn't find Minto at the Christmas Party, but I was on my lead so I couldn't have a good look. I said Hello to Person Ann's little Patterdales and to Toby and Bella who are Jack Russells. I said Hello to the Other Monty who is a Whippet. I was a bit unsure of a Big Lassie Dog so a lay on my back to be on the safe side.

I was just beginning to Enjoy Myself when Person took me back to the car. Marmite and Monty the Mont SNIFFED me.

SAUSAGES?

Bye Bye Harry

I have just come home from Person Training (Dog Training ha ha).

I am sad because I am never going to see Harry-Who's-Very-Clever ever again. He said Goodbye to us for EVER because his Persons are moving house. Here is a picture of Harry.

I was a Very Good Dog at Training. Better than I have ever been. I was in the Top Class and did some new things. Perfectly. There were lots of new Dogs I had never met before. Even when Big Dogs Growled at each other it was OK. Person took no notice and she's my Alpha Wolf, so I took no notice either.

Marmite was a Very Good Dog at Training. Better at Training than she had ever been before too. She even moved Faster than Very Slow!

Don't tell Linsey-Trainer-Person but we had done NO Practice at Home for Three Weeks.

Person says since she started learning Dog Listening and being an Alpha Wolf it has made a Big Difference to me at home and a Big Difference to Marmite at home. It has only made a Little Difference to Monty the Mont - SO FAR.

Monty the Mont was NOT a Relaxed and Happy Dog at Training. He was a Worried Dog. He was Worried that Person might not really be an Alpha Wolf, so he was TESTING her even more than usual. Person gave up and put him out in the car.

Person says Monty the Mont ISN’T READY yet.

All the Dogs and all the Persons are having a Christmas PARTY soon with Linsey-Trainer-Person. Will Monty the Mont have to Stay in the Car? Monty the Mont Barks and Barks if he is left in the car all by himself. Monty the Mont still PANICS when he is left anywhere all by himself.

Anyway, I am Very Good at being a Relaxed and Happy Dog.

She-Person going OUT

Tomorrow She-Person is going OUT again All Day and All Evening. (She is Going OUT a lot just now).

He-Person will be here.

When I am Biting Marmite's Ear He-Person SHOUTS at me from a Long Way Away PACK IT IN. I pretend I don't hear him. He SHOUTS at all of us from a Long Way Away when we BARK at Dogs going past the end of our Field. HEY, PACK IT IN! PIP? MARMITE? MONTY? PACK IT IN. He always SHOUTS at me first because Everything is always My Fault. Anyway, that's what he thinks. He always SHOUTS at Monty the Mont last, because Monty is his Favourite. There might be a lot of SHOUTING tomorrow when She-Person is OUT.

She-Person isn't doing CANINE COMMUNICATION tomorrow. She is WALKING ON FIRE instead. Perhaps. I couldn't Walk, Run, Chase and Hunt with Burnt Feet. Person would have to carry me. I would need to go to the Vet, like I did when I had my Wound. Who will carry Person if she has Burnt Feet?





Here I am, trying to make Monty the Mont PLAY with me.

Pip the Movie - 1

Yesterday we had some Bad News. There is no Training today. Linsey-Trainer-Person is Coughing and BARKING. Linsey can Stop Dogs Barking so she should be able to Stop herself from Barking too.

This means I won't be seeing Minto.

My She-Person was OUT a lot yesterday. She went Out to Lunch with Joy-Person, then she went OUT to do Jobs for Granny-Person. She was OUT All Evening at a MEETING. When she Came Home she discovered we had been Playing INSIDE and we are only allowed to Play OUTSIDE. The rugs were messed up. He-Person had fallen asleep and even our PLAYING didn't wake him.

She-Person's MEETING was about Video Emails. Person says these Video Emails are Perfect for me because I can't Read or Write. I can SEE and HEAR. I am a SIGHT HOUND with Very Good HEARING.

I can't TALK but I can BARK. So can Monty The Mont and so can Marmite. We BARK at the black and white CAT.

I don't understand Emails. I certainly don't understand Video Emails. It's very CONFUSING when I hear us BARKING inside the computer box. Perhaps She-Person will Train us about Video Emails with TREATS.

Anyway, here is a special VIDEO EMAIL of ME! I am with Monty the Mont and Marmite and we are BARKING at the black and white Cat who is sitting STARING at us in the trees. Then I am in my favourite LOOK-OUT place.

Click Here for Pip, the Movie - 1

Digging

When Person was doing Tea or Coffee at Sue-Person-Neighbour-From-Heaven's yesterday, we worked on a Big New HOLE. He-Person found it. That BLOODY PIP has been DIGGING again.

Our new HOLE is in the corner of our field, by the fence. On the other side of our fence is a Cycle Track. This is where Trains once used to go. Not only Persons on Cycles go on it. People RUN there (I love Running), and people who WALK as well - and LOTS of DOGS. We always BARK at the Dogs to let them know that this is OUR TERRITORY. Monty the Mont BARKS the most.

Here is a picture of me on the table, HIGH UP. I can SEE right down the Cycle Track from here. I can see Persons and DOGS. I am a SIGHT Hound.

We have tried to DIG OUT under the fence before. Persons don't always find our HOLES. Once we did DIG OUT. Marmite squeezed through the HOLE because she has short legs. She went for a Walk and Sniff down the Cycle Track by herself. I squeezed through the HOLE because I'm Skinny. I explored the Farmer's Field but thought I'd better not go away too far. Monty the Mont didn't GET OUT. He was too big for our HOLE.

Today Monty the Mont is LIMPING. He has a Sore Front Paw. I know how he got that sore Front Paw! DIGGING. (I haven't got a Sore Front Paw).

Person has covered our HOLE now and says she will put Concrete in it today. Person likes Concrete.

Barking

Bark Bark Bark Bark BARK. My Person has a Cough and a Cold.

I can't get a Cold but I can get COLD. Then I just shiver (quietly). I don't bark.

I have got a Wound.