My Nose

We had another Visitor yesterday. It was Brian-Person.

My Person is still doing her Dog Listening and pretending she is an Alpha Wolf. I heard her saying to Brian outside the door PLEASE IGNORE THE DOGS until they Settle Down.

But Brian Loves Dogs. He tried to IGNORE us, but when I pushed my nose into his hand he gave me a little private fuss. I didn't Jump Up once! Nor did Monty the Mont and nor did Marmite. Person didn't have to put us OUTSIDE.

Granny-Person was here as well. Even she said we were Very Good Dogs and Very Calm when a Visitor came and Granny-Person Doesn't really Like Dogs. Not even me. She doesn't like my wet cold Nose.

Anyway, my Person loves my wet cold Nose. Don't tell her, but I am GETTING THE MESSAGE. And don't tell her, but I really Quite Like my Persons being Alpha Wolves. So does Monty the Mont and so does Marmite.

No Breakfast

This morning I didn't have any Breakfast.

We watched Person do her 'Gesture Eating' - she had a cheesy smelling biscuit this morning, and then she put my Bowl down. But I Walked Away from it. I thought - I'm not going to play this Game today. Person then put down Monty the Mont's Bowl and he started Eating immediately. Then she put down Marmite's Bowl and she started Eating immediately too.

So Person just picked up my Bowl and took it away!

OH.

Hannawannah who is Person's Last-Born is here this weekend. She says she notices a Big Difference in me, and in Monty the Mont and in Marmite. I haven't seen Hannawannah for a long time and when she came in she IGNORED me! I nearly jumped up and Person put me straight OUTSIDE. Then Monty the Mont pranced and Person put him OUTSIDE too. Soon she let us in again and we kept our Feet on the Ground.

Some Persons came to Eat, Drink and Talk yesterday. Neighbours-From-Heaven Sue-Person and Artist came, and Brian-Person and Christine-Person as well. Brian and Christine have Toby and Bella and they go to Training Classes. Toby and Bella are Jack Russells and they haven't had their tails Cut Off. (I broke a wine glass with my Tail yesterday. It was on the Low Table). When Brian and Christine came in they tried to ignore us. We all tried to jump up so Person put us straight OUTSIDE.

We stayed OUTSIDE for a long time. We went in our Big Kennel. We were Very Good Dogs.

He-Person hasn't called me THAT BLOODY PIP for Five Days now! He did say FLAMING PIP though when I broke the wine glass which was on the Low Table yesterday.

Anyway, perhaps Person will give me Breakfast back soon.

Once I was so little I could get into the Bird Bath.

Golf

Sometimes He-Person says "I'm Going Out to Hit Some Balls".

He is talking about something called Golf.

This is another Strange thing Persons do. It is part of SPORT. (My She-Person Isn't Interested in Sport). He-Person watches Football on TV. In Football you play with a Ball you can't HAVE. He-Person loves Rugby best of all. Rugby uses a funny ball that doesn't roll straight. Rugby is better than Football because you can HAVE the Ball sometimes.

I would like the SCRUM. So would Monty the Mont and so would Marmite. We do SCRUMS in our Field.

But Golf!

Golf Balls are Very Very Small. Golf Balls are Dangerous to Dogs. To Play Golf Persons have bags on wheels which they pull along. There are Sticks in the bags with wheels. Golf Persons carry little Golf Balls in their pockets. They Walk round a special Golf Field talking to each other. Golf Fields are very Tidy.They have little Holes in them and Sand Pits.

Now and then Golf Persons just STOP and one Golf Person puts a little Ball very carefully on the ground. He looks at the Ball. He chooses the best stick - are the sticks all different? He looks away in the distance. He looks at the BALL again. Then he HITS the Ball. Then the other Persons copy him.

Then they go back to Walking and Talking. I have never seen Persons who do Golf having a Scrum.

Dogs are not allowed in Fields where Persons Play Golf. I would like to Dig more HOLES. Monty the Mont would help me and so would Marmite. We could Hunt for Lost Balls. We could SCRUM in the Sand Pits.



Yesterday evening Monty was lying in My place next to Person on the sofa. I asked and asked him to get off. I even tried biting his nose. He IGNORED me. Is he copying Person by IGNORING me?

Anyway, I just pushed in next to him and in the end he got off.

Baby

It Rained all night. it's Raining again today.

Person is still doing Dog Listening on us. STRANGE. Anyway, we are Happy Dogs. Even Monty the Mont is Quite Happy as you can see.

I had so much to tell you about Person going away to do Wolves and Dog Listening, that I forgot to tell you that she went to London to see Luke and Lovely Louise. Luke is Person's Fourth-Born and Lovely Louise is having a Baby. I told you before how they looked inside her and told her it was a Girl Baby.

It takes NINE Months for Persons to make Baby Persons, and after all that time they can't even Walk! Not for about a YEAR. Persons usually only have one Baby at a time. It only took my mum TWO Months to make me and I could Walk almost straight away! There were about seven babies inside my mum with me.

If Dogs can make Seven Babies in two months, but Persons only make One Baby in 9 months, that means there must be lot more Dogs than Persons in the world. I wonder where they all are.

Luke and Lovely Louise live in a Flat. It isn't really Flat, it's Tall. There are lots of stone steps to go up to get into their Flat.

The Flat is near a place called Spittalfields. I think I would like Spittalfields - but not if it's Raining.

Dog Listener

There is no Dog Training (Person Training) Class this week so I shan't see Minto. Meanwhile Person is practising being a Dog Listener.

We are not going Out for any Walks or Runs or Hunts or Sniffs or Classes until we know who is really Leader of the Pack and until we have Got THE MESSAGE in our own territory.

This is the third day after Person did Dog Listening. Person is doing STRANGE things. We are Getting THE MESSAGE.

Person eats before we do while we watch her. She calls this 'Gesture Eating'.

Person goes through the door to OUTSIDE first when she sends us OUT. She only lets us IN when I am not jumping on the door making my sad noises, and when Monty the Mont isn't crashing against the door squeeking, and when Marmite isn't giving her little barks. Person lets us all IN together when Person feels like it.

I don't have to WORRY about anything.

Even Monty the Mont is Happy to Play with us in the Field. He doesn't WORRY so much about going back to Look After the Persons. They can Look After themselves. They can Look After us.

Dog Listeners use very Kind Voices. No Cross Voices. No Shouting. Everything is Very CALM in the house. Even Monty the Mont is more CALM.

I don't need to Jump Up any more. Marmite doesn't need to Jump Up any more. Monty the Mont still Prances and Jumps Up sometimes. When Monty the Mont Jumps Up and Prances Person turns her back on him and IGNORES him. She then calls her to him and if he doesn't Jump Up she makes a big fuss of him. If he Jumps Up she IGNORES him again.

Monty the Mont is beginning to Get THE MESSAGE too.

Anyway, He-Person is happy because Marmite doesn't Jump onto him any more when he is sitting on the sofa trying to watch Sport on TV, to Lick and Lick and Wag and Wag her tail.

Alpha Wolf makes the Decisions

In just one single evening alone Person got up and Opened and Shut the Door for us TWENTY-SEVEN TIMES. She counted. The only Door to OUTSIDE is in the Sitting Room where Persons Sit all the time.

Person is 'Gaining Control of the Door'. Person is Practising being and Alpha Wolf.

Since Person came back from doing Canine Communication and Wolves at Jan Fennell's farm things have been DIFFERENT. Things are also very QUIET. Jan Fennell has Eleven Spaniels and Two Utonagans. Utonagans look just like Wolves but they are not Wild. The dogs don't make a fuss of Persons. They are PEACEFUL Dogs.

In our House it used to happen like this. Marmite would carry on making her funny Grimbling noise from where she was lying until Person couldn't stand it any longer. Person would Open the door to let her OUT and then Close it again. (Person doesn't just leave the door open because it's too cold for her). Then I would need to see what Marmite was doing so I make my sad little noise until Person would get up, Open the door for me, then Close it again. A few minutes later Monty the Mont would think that he had better be OUT with Us so he squeeked to go OUT. Person would get up and Open then Close the door for Monty the Mont.

Then we would all want to come back IN.

Monty the Mont always wants to come back IN first. He needs to make sure that Persons haven't gone away anywhere without him. The I want to come IN a bit later, to keep an eye on Monty the Mont. Marmite likes being outside and Marmite doesn't care much where I am or where Monty the Mont is or even where Persons are, so Marmite comes IN last.

A little while ago Persons had to get a new Handle for the Door because the old one fell off.

This is why Person is Gaining Control of the Door. She says that the Alpha Wolf decides where the pack goes and when. The Alpha Wolf makes the DECISIONS. And Persons are the Alpha Wolves. I am not an Alpha Wolf. Nor is Monty the Mont and certainly not Marmite.

So, Person is now deciding when we go OUT. Person is now deciding when we come back IN again. If one of us goes OUT we all go OUT. If one of us comes IN we all come IN. We have to WAIT. This way Person Opens then Closes the door once instead of three times.

That is the idea anyway.

Unfortunately yesterday afternoon Marmite spoilt it all. Marmite was Not Very Well, just like I Wasn't Very Well last week. So yesterday Marmite asked to go out lots of times. Marmite always makes lots of grimbling noises for a long time until she is let OUT. Person tried IGNORING her.

That was not a good idea. Person hadn't realised that Marmite Wasn't Very Well.

This picture is when I was very little and Marmite and Monty the Mont were looking after me.

Ignoring us

WELL!

My Person was Away from Home doing Canine Communication for TWO WHOLE DAYS. She has never been Away from Home at Night Time before - not since she has had me. And when she came Back Home after all that time away she IGNORED ME. I thought she was finding out that Dogs were really Wolves. She smelt of Spaniels not Wolves.

Something STRANGE is happening.

We were EXCITED to see her, but when Monty the Mont jumped up at her she just turned her back on him and IGNORED HIM. It was because we were so Excited and she was IGNORING US that we started to Scrap with each other instead. We aren't allowed to Scrap in the House.

Person didn't shout OUT like she usually does. She quietly walked OUTSIDE and we quietly followed. Then she left us OUTSIDE.

STRANGE.

We soon jumped up at the door and cried to come in but she IGNORED US. She only let us in when we stopped making a fuss. She calls it Gaining Control of the Door. I knew I was right to feel suspicious about this Canine Communication stuff.

Person had only been Home for a little while when both Persons went to Neighbours-From-Heaven to Eat and Talk and Drink and they left us Alone.

I know Person is showing us WHO is really LEADER of the PACK and it's not me. Nor is it Monty the Mont. Nor is it Marmite.

So while I still had a chance I climbed up onto the chair and onto the piano to get the Toy Fluffy Dog. The Vase crashed to the floor.

When they came home Persons weren't Cross with me.

It was even worse. Persons IGNORED ME. She-Person cleared up the mess. She called Monty the Mont and Cuddled him. She called Marmite and she Cuddled her. She didn't call me. She IGNORED ME. She didn't Cuddle me.

STRANGE.

This morning Breakfast was DIFFERENT too. Person put our three bowls on the table. She also put a bowl for HERSELF on the table. Very STRANGE.

We watched her carefully. We watched everything she was doing. She measured Monty the Mont's food into his bowl. She measured Marmite's food into her bowl - a bit less because Marmite is too fat. She then measured my food into my bowl. She then ATE SOMETHING FROM HER OWN BOWL and she IGNORED US! (Hmm. I think Person is making some sort of point here).

We watched very carefully. When Person had finished her Eating she called Marmite and put Marmite's bowl down. She then called Monty the Mont and she put his bowl down. She then called Pip and she put my bowl down. Then she went away and left us.

For some reason I thought I had better not eat Slowly this time to tease Monty the Mont. I ate Quickly. As soon as we had finished Person took our bowls away.

Then Person called me to her and she gave me a Cuddle. It seemed a specially nice Cuddle to me. I felt SAFE.