Tobi from Costa Rica

Here are two pictures of My Friend Tobi from Costa Rica, who writes to me in my Blog.

Persons went out to Talk Talk Eat and Drink with Neighbours-from-Heaven yesterday evening.

I only did one naughty thing while Persons were out. I chewed up a Spoon. I didn't jump onto the piano and Break a Vase this time.

My Person Talked to Neighbours-From-Heaven about Wolves and being a Dog Listener. (They did warn her on the Canine Communication Course about becoming a Jan Fennell Bore).

Certificate of Advanced Canine Communication

Person came home yesterday evening with a 'Certificate of Advanced Canine Communication'.

I had not seen Person for Three Whole Days, nor had Marmite and nor had Monty the Mont. She had not see US for three whole days either.

And do you know what? Person came in the door and she IGNORED US!

(I did hear Person saying she was very very pleased with us because we didn't jump around her. We sniffed her (she smelt of Jan Fennells spaniels) and we followed her about but we didn't get excited.

Anyway, soon Person called us to her and made a fuss of us and put our collars on.

Collars on? We're going out somewhere?

Well, she put my collar on and she put Marmite's collar on, but Monty the Mont started to Prance About, so she didn't put Monty the Mont's collar on. She went and sat down at her computer instead.

She then called Monty the Mont to her again and he was quiet while she put on his collar.

Person next fetched our leads but Monty the Mont had forgotten something! He started jumping about and Person put his lead away again. I had to wait in the car and so did Marmite. Then Monty the Mont too came out to the car nice and quietly.

Persons then took us out to the Person Training (Dog Training ha ha) Christmas Party.

Certificate of Advanced Canine Communication????

Well, I'll tell you about the Christmas Party tomorrow!

Here is a picture of my Person and the other new Dog Listeners. Tony who Taught them all is fourth from the left.

A Message from my Person

Person is still away but she has sent me a message.

Person says she has had Two Days learning how to be a Jan Fennell Dog Listener and she's having a Very Interesting Time and a Very Good Time.

A Very Good Time without Me?

Jan Fennell's son is called Tony Dog Listener. He has been Teaching my Person. This means no more playing Food Games for me or she will pick up my bowl straight away. No more fussing for Marmite when Person calls her and she just stays in bed looking lovely. No more Walks for Monty the Mont while he still Prances About at the door or Lunges.

Persons says she now Understands us even Better (oh dear) and we will be even MORE Happy than before. How can that be?

Person says she will now be Understanding Other People's Dogs too.

Person also tells me she has been doing Role Play. I hope she does some Role Play with me. I would like that. I like Playing and I like Rolls.

Happy Dogs

Person is getting ready to Go Away next week for Three Whole Days.

She should then have a Certificate in Canine Communication and How to be a Dog Listener from Jan Fennell.

Person can then visit the homes of Persons whose Dogs are UNHAPPY. Their Dogs are SO UNHAPPY that they want to BITE Persons and they want to BITE other Dogs and they want to BITE the Chairs and Doors. My Person will show these Persons how to be Alpha Wolves which will make their Dogs more Happy.

I am a very Happy Dog. Marmite is a very Happy Dog. Monty the Mont is a very Happy Dog at Home. He's not always a very Happy Dog when he's OUT when there are other Dogs because he's On the Defensive. He doesn't Bite them but he sometimes GROWLS. And he's a Very UNHAPPY Dog if he's left all by himself in the Car.

But Monty the Mont is Getting Much Better. Person says that it takes some Dogs quite a Long Time to give up the BURDEN of trying to be an Alpha Wolf and thinking that they have to do all the Worrying about Everything.

Anyway, Me - I can't be bothered with all that! Too much Responsibility for me! Just so long as Marmite and Monty the Mont realise that I must always be IN FRONT of them, I'm Happy.

I have to keep showing Monty the Mont who is really the Boss. He thinks he is - ha ha!

No More Sofa

These Pictures show you WHAT'S HAPPENED.

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She Person is going away for Three Whole Days next week. She is going to finish her Dog Listening Course at Jan Fennell's Farmhouse. Jan Fennell has Eleven Spaniels.

I think Person has already learnt a bit too much about UNDERSTANDING DOGS.

He-Person will look after us while she is Away.

Will He-Person be Alpha Wolf while Person is Away? Will he do Gesture Eating before putting our Bowls down? Will he pick up our Bowls as soon as we have finished? Will he IGNORE us when he comes in? Will he Keep Control of the Door to OUTSIDE?

While He-Person is busy Watching Sport on TV VERY LOUD will I be able to Creep back onto the Sofa again? Will Marmite? Will Monty the Mont who is really He-Person's Favourite?

Ignoring us

WELL!

My Person was Away from Home doing Canine Communication for TWO WHOLE DAYS. She has never been Away from Home at Night Time before - not since she has had me. And when she came Back Home after all that time away she IGNORED ME. I thought she was finding out that Dogs were really Wolves. She smelt of Spaniels not Wolves.

Something STRANGE is happening.

We were EXCITED to see her, but when Monty the Mont jumped up at her she just turned her back on him and IGNORED HIM. It was because we were so Excited and she was IGNORING US that we started to Scrap with each other instead. We aren't allowed to Scrap in the House.

Person didn't shout OUT like she usually does. She quietly walked OUTSIDE and we quietly followed. Then she left us OUTSIDE.

STRANGE.

We soon jumped up at the door and cried to come in but she IGNORED US. She only let us in when we stopped making a fuss. She calls it Gaining Control of the Door. I knew I was right to feel suspicious about this Canine Communication stuff.

Person had only been Home for a little while when both Persons went to Neighbours-From-Heaven to Eat and Talk and Drink and they left us Alone.

I know Person is showing us WHO is really LEADER of the PACK and it's not me. Nor is it Monty the Mont. Nor is it Marmite.

So while I still had a chance I climbed up onto the chair and onto the piano to get the Toy Fluffy Dog. The Vase crashed to the floor.

When they came home Persons weren't Cross with me.

It was even worse. Persons IGNORED ME. She-Person cleared up the mess. She called Monty the Mont and Cuddled him. She called Marmite and she Cuddled her. She didn't call me. She IGNORED ME. She didn't Cuddle me.

STRANGE.

This morning Breakfast was DIFFERENT too. Person put our three bowls on the table. She also put a bowl for HERSELF on the table. Very STRANGE.

We watched her carefully. We watched everything she was doing. She measured Monty the Mont's food into his bowl. She measured Marmite's food into her bowl - a bit less because Marmite is too fat. She then measured my food into my bowl. She then ATE SOMETHING FROM HER OWN BOWL and she IGNORED US! (Hmm. I think Person is making some sort of point here).

We watched very carefully. When Person had finished her Eating she called Marmite and put Marmite's bowl down. She then called Monty the Mont and she put his bowl down. She then called Pip and she put my bowl down. Then she went away and left us.

For some reason I thought I had better not eat Slowly this time to tease Monty the Mont. I ate Quickly. As soon as we had finished Person took our bowls away.

Then Person called me to her and she gave me a Cuddle. It seemed a specially nice Cuddle to me. I felt SAFE.

Understanding Dogs

Here I am at the end of another Hard Day.

I fear I shan't be allowed On the Sofa for much longer. This is because of Person's Canine Communication Course next weekend and Jan Fennell will teach her to UNDERSTAND DOGS.

I know she will learn that Dogs are really WOLVES and that Dogs are not Persons. Persons go on Sofas. Wolves stay on the Floor or in their Beds.

Canine Communication says we are Happier Dogs if we Know Our PLACE.

But I AM a Happy Dog. I'm a VERY Happy Dog - especially when I am Sleeping on Person on the Sofa. I know my PLACE is on the Sofa. Monty the Mont is a Happy Dog too (when he's not On the Defensive). Marmite is a Very Happy Dog.

I'm especially Happy when I am lying on Person on the Sofa. I'm not quite so Happy about Person UNDERSTANDING DOGS though.

Flaming Marmite

I have been That BLOODY PIP again. While Person was doing Tea or Coffee with Sue-Person next door I pulled bits off the baby olive tree so now it has a cage around it. (He-Person calles Marmite That FLAMING MARMITE when she keeps asking to go OUT then IN then OUT then IN making her Grimbling noise to go out and little yaps to come back in. He-Person calls Monty the Mont MONTY. Not Bloody Monty or Flaming Monty. Monty is his favourite, you see).

Person is going on a Course very soon. It is called a Canine Communication Course and is run by someone called Jan Fennell who does DOG LISTENING. It's because I am really a WOLF and I must be UNDERSTOOD better. So must Marmite and so must Monty the Mont. I like the sound of that.

Person will then UNDERSTAND that I don't want to do DOWN sometimes. She will UNDERSTAND that Digging is GOOD.

We have Person Training today. We have been Practising at Home. We have had lots of Treats.

PS. I haven't told you about my Wound for a long time. My hair has nearly grown all around it but there is a SCAR left to see.

PS. Mary-Contrary-Person's Dog called Nellie the Collie who lives with Robin the Golden Labrador is still not very well. She had an Operation. She is a Very Old Dog.